A Prayer For Peace

Peace out there;

Peace in here;

Oh, there're dreams of peace;

Reaching for what's right;

Clutching it tight;

Firm fist, but empty release;

My soul stutters;

Vile hypocrisy utters;

Re-re-reciting old rules;

Divergent - chasing night,

At the very hint of light;

Stubborn like legions of mules;

Loyal, but poorly tethered;

War-weary and weathered;

Hopedeath masquerades;

Thin-skinned and hollowed;

Too much allowed;

Alternative? quickly fades;

No peace in here;

No peace out there;

Wars of all kinds rage;

Imperial force;

A seductive course;

Has anyone seen the Sage?

This cry for help;

A Barbaric Yawp;

Desperate for Divine attention;

Current to the Falls;

"Hear my last calls!"

"Come disrupt my fool intention."

The Pledge of Allegiance

There is an intense debate over at Preacher Mike about the Pledge of Allegiance. Here was my final comment. I'd love to hear some comments.
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When Jesus said, “give to Ceasar what is Ceasar’s and to God what is God’s” he was addressing this very issue. Yes, the context was paying taxes, but the meaning of the statement runs deeper than taxes. I don’t think anyone here is saying not to love America. I think the question is how to love America.

Maybe allegiance needs a little “a” in reference to America (or whichever counrty) and a capital “A” in reference to God. Or maybe the pledge of allegiance is due for an overhaul.

“I pledge my support to the United States of America in the good she does for her people and those around the world. I support her ideals of liberty and justice for all people. I pledge to support her when she is right and confront her when she is wrong. I promise my support to the extent that she is a blessing to her own people and to the world.”

OK, that was off the top of my head and it is actually pretty lame, but what a statement like this does is build in some limits and eliminate blind faith in a government. I think we all agree that we want to support what is good about America and diminish what is bad about America. I know that we will not ever all agree on what is good or bad, but maybe it is more honest assessment of allegiance.

God loves America and Christians should follow God’s lead. God also loves Iran, and Christians should follow that lead. In fact, I would wager to say that God has pledged His allegiance to loving America - and Iran and whatever other country. “For God so loved the world…” With that kind of love, with that kind of allegiance to love, God’ is boundless and transcendent. God’s allegiance is to loving the world, nations, and people, but His allegiacne is not to obey them.

God is in the world, but not of the world. God is America, but not of America. God is in me, but not of me. The difference is huge. God only submits to the world in ways that satisfy his incarnational mission to redeem the world, which means he never loses his transcendence. He is not contained within anything. We must strive to be incarnational Christians on a mission to redeem this world we love, this nations we love, and people we love.

You are not poop

Isn't that a relief?

Famous pastor and author and now emerging church critic John MacArthur, calls the emerging church a poopstain on the garments of Christ in his recent book, The Truth War. WOW! That's sounds like something from an emerging church pastor - only the emerging church pastor might say "shitstain."

And, just so you don't think John MacArthur or emerging church pastors are a bunch of potty-mouths, the "poopstain" terminology comes right out of the Bible, in the book of Jude. So, be careful who you're calling a potty-mouth.

Anyway, Tall Skinny Kiwi makes a good and respectful critique of the MacArthur's beef with all things emerging in church.

MacArthur has it right in one sense: there is war for truth. Sadly, my guess is that he does not understand who his friends and enemies are.

Making Killers of Kids

Folks, slavery is not even close to being a problem of the past.

There are nations, militaries, paramilitaries, and thugs groups that make soldiers out of children. They snatch these children from their families, kill their families, brainwash them, and threaten them and make killing machines of them. OF CHILDREN!!!!!


Click here to make your voice heard. Or read more below and then click to make your voice heard.




The Child Soldier Prevention Act of 2007

Stopping the use of child soldiers begins at home.

The UnitedStates currently provides military assistance to eight of the nine countries that are reportedly implicated in child soldier usage:

* Burundi
* Chad
* Colombia
* Cote d'Ivoire
* Democratic Republic of Congo
* Sri Lanka
* Sudan
* Uganda

However, a bill recently introduced in the U.S. Senate would putrestrictions on U.S. military assistance for governments thatuse child soldiers. The Child Soldier Prevention Act of 2007 (S.1175) would curtail U.S. military assistance to governments that fail to take stepsto demobilize and stop forcing/recruiting children into thearmed forces or government-supported militias. Countries that do take steps to disarm, demobilize and rehabilitate child soldiers would be eligible for certain forms of assistance to help professionalize their forces and ensure that U.S. tax payer dollars are not used to finance the exploitation of children inarmed conflict.

Click here to make your voice heard.

What's Right and Wrong With Parenting Research 2.0

Within the parenting research literature there is a body of research literature called, "Parental Monitoring." In many of the articles written, "parental monitoring" is defined as an act or behavior of the parent. It is measured, however, as how much the parent knows about what their child/adolescent is doing.

Did you catch the mismatch? Define it one way and measure it another way. This mismatch has caused confusion and not a few false assumptions. It was assumed that parents came to know what their adolesent children were doing was mostly because of something that parents were doing. That was a big fat assumption.

What was missing for the longest time was HOW parents came to know things. Since the word "monitoring" was used in so many studies, it was assumed that parents came to know what their children (mainly adolescents) were doing. Parental knowledge came by way of something the parents did.

However, recent studies have said, "Hey, parental monitoring is one thing and parental knowledge is another. Let's measure knowledge and call it knowledge. And while we're at it, let's not assume parents know things because parents do things."

What has emerged is a terrific collection of studies that have found out something that is pretty dramaitc. Parental knowledge is more a function of what the adolesent does, not what the parent does. Parental knowledge comes from adolescent self-disclosure more than from any other source.

That is not just a major difference, it is a complete reversal from previous assumptions. The locus of control over information about the lives of adolescents rests with the adolescents, and not the parents. This research makes a whole lot of sense if you think about it. If an adolescent doesn't want to talk, that kid won't talk. If a teen wants to hide the truth, guess what? The truth will remain hid.

So, what power does a parent have if parental knowledge is in the hands of the child? Quite a bit actually. What the parent must do is create the kind of relationship wherein the adolescent would want to self-disclose. This relationship pattern should be begin before the child is an adolescent. It should begin at birth and continue on forever.

Parents have a whole lot of influence and power with their adolescent children, but it is not forced or imposed as much as parents might like believe (or how some research might imply).

What kind of relatinoship do you think results in adolescent self-disclosure?

Truth Too. Point? Oh no.

Start "What is truth series?" here.
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This is the second post on the "What is truth?" series. The question in this post addresses sources and/or forms of truth. Here is the question:

Is truth found in facts, in metaphor, in story, in myth, in proof, in promise?

In a word, "Yes!" And then again in another word, "No."

What gets a lot of people into trouble with truth is that they choose a form through which truth has been known to emerge and limit truth to the form. I have a lot of religious experience limiting truth to facts. There is a certain logic to it. "The Bible says what it means and means what it says." This line has ended many a debate in my earlier religious life.

Now, to the credit of the powers that be, the people with enough power to utter the above words, when it comes to "Love your neighbor as you love yourself," there is little to parse. It is a fact that this is a command of God.

And yet, as we can see from the parable of "The Good Samartian," the fact was not enough for some. Some wanted a criteria for determining how a person qualified as a neighbor. Even though the very fact that one would want to ask such a question exposes the darkness of their own heart, truth in the form of fact for that person was not enough. This person needed a story in order for truth to make an impression.

The story, which had no facts in it at all (Jesus made it up and the characters were not real nor was the event), was another way in which truth could be known.

Truth was not limited to facts. Actually, in this situation, the truth was inhibited by facts. Jesus learned that in this situation, the use of fact to communicate truth was not an effective way to communicate that truth. So, what Jesus did was to communicate the exact same truth in story.

It was in story, not fact, that the truth emerged in that specific situation.

From this Biblical example, we could conclude that story is superior to fact in communicating truth. But if we did that we would be missing the point. Some people in the audience probably got it the first time when Jesus used fact, but then there were others who got it when they heard the same truth in story. Still others were probably unconvinced, and might have needed another means by which truth could be presented to them. Still others were unwilling to receive truth in any way.

The point is that fact and story had their role, but truth is not subject to either of them.

Now, to expand from there, truth can be shown in metaphor, myth, promise, beauty, science, fantasy, art, song, dance, and who knows how else? Truth is not limited to a form of communication or presentation. Truth is bigger, deeper, more complex, more simple, more perfect than any one way of presenting can contain.

We should not equate a way of knowing truth with truth itself.

What's Right and Wrong With Parenting Research

Researchers have been learning about parenting for decades, centuries probably. I think that research on parenting is important and some of it is even useful for parents.

Background.
In the mid 1970's, "quality time" came to the forefront on the parenting research scene and in popular culture as women were setting record numbers in their move to full time work outside the home. The difference between amount of time parents spent with kids (quantity) and the kind of time parents spent with kids (quality) was examined.

What is right with parenting research.
Most parenting researchers care about what they are researching and want to contribute to the betterment of research. Tons of studies have been conducted on parenting and quality time. There is no end in sight for parenting research. There is a strong market for it and parents constantly want to know what to do with their children.

I read an article in the May 2007 Journal of Marriage and Family which investigates parenting and quality time. Great article. The basic question it chases is: "How do parents define quality time?" Very good question. If researchers are not doing research on the same "quality time" as parents are doing and defining as "quality time," then there is a disconnect. I am so glad this research is being done.

What is wrong with parenting research.
Why did it take 30 years for researchers to ask parents what they thought quality time was? Why did it take three decades of researchers defining what quality time was or even worse (which is in most cases) just assume everyone was on the same page without even thinking to ask actual parents?

There are some things researchers need to define and set the standard on for language, but then there are things researchers need to humble themselves and ask the real experts (parents) what they do, how they define terms, what makes a difference for them.

There is something wrong with researchers when it takes them 30 years to ask a question that seems so basic and elementary as "How do parents define quality time?"

"What Is Truth?" Won Point? Oh!

Thus begins the "what is truth?" series.

I believe Pilate made famous the questions, "What is Truth?" I think he really wanted to know. I wish Jesus would have answered like Jack Nicholson and said, "You can't handle the truth," but he didn't.

"What is truth?" is a great question. It can be an honest question, but it isn't always. Some people feel like only other people should be asking the question because they already know the answer. Some people think that other people should ask them what truth is. Others think they can never have any truth or that it is arrogant to say one knows even a particle of truth.

I wonder what the truth about truth is. The followong questions will be pursued in this series. I'd love to ahve some good conversation as this series progresses. I do not come to these questions as a theologian. I come as a regular Christian who has learned, unlearned and relearned and reunleanred and questioned and been confused and confident, sometimes in the same sentence. I come with questions to the question.

Is truth something that can be known by reciting scriptures and practicing rituals?
Is truth something that can be known in its entirety?

If truth causes harm, is it really true truth (are there untrue ways to truth)?

Is truth a collection of select content, a process, a direction, a way, a level of beauty, a potential?

Is truth found in facts, in metaphor, in story, in myth, in proof, in promise?

There may be more questions that arise as the series begins, but this is the promise of a series of at least five more posts. I hope you'll join me with a lively conversation.

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Go to the second post of "What is truth?"

Lost Finale

Excellent!!!

Jack's flashforwards were powerful and speak to the force of context and how it influences people. I was reminded of the crisis I had after graduating with a bachelors degree and entering "real life." In college I knew who I was because I knew what to do in my familiar place. I knew how to be involved, how to stay active, how to lead, what my role was etc. When my context was no longer accessible, I had hard time adjusting (although I did not resort to oxycontin).

Lost has tapped into the power of context to influence roles in a person's life. In fact, that is what Lost has been about for three years - context.

In large measure, it is also about conversion. Make whatever religious connections you want, the show is about conversion.

Conversion and context. Change a person's context and they must convert in order to survive. After college, I had to convert. After getting into a committed relationship, I had to convert. After having children I had to convert.

From a religious perspective, including people into your context is powerful. Should they accept your acceptance, that is a sort of conversion.

Blog Blather

Here are my blog stats so far for 2007:

• every 15 minutes, someone visits a page on my blog
• People from every inhabited continent visit my blog
• At least once a day someone gets to my blog because of a picture of Ann Coulter and Larry King
• The more edgy I get, the more hits I get - and the more criticism I get
• Creativity is rewarded by hits and occasionally links
• A few people turn my blog daily
• Lots of people hit is once and never return
• Most people never comment
• I know of at least professor who reads my blog
• I read my blog
• My blog will continue to exist for some time
• I have 22 incoming links
• I have tons of outgoing links on my blogroll (and want to increase)
• Technorati ranks me in the 200,000s
• I want more links
• I rarely have 10 comments on one post
• When I do have 10 comments or more on one post, half of them are mine.

OK, if you've gotten this far, feel free to blather about your blog in the comments. If you're not linked already in my side bar, you will be rewarded with a link if you do.

You are rich if you have friends

Over the past few days I have had some terrific conversation with friends. One is a friend of nearly 30 years and one is a friend of less than one year. Having a relationship without judgment, without criteria that must be must, and without pretence is a treasure.

In academia, I live in a world with judgment, criteria, and pretence. I am not dissing academia, as I believe these qualities are necessary (except the pretence) in order to produce the best research. What I am saying is that in a world where the bar is so high for production and precision, having relational place where what matters is the person is of great value.

I am sure this is true in most life siutations. Most work places are not structured to develop friendships with long stretches of tiem for talking and laughing. Much of life in America is not friend friendly.

If you have friends and you have time for those friendships to develop, you have something very special.

The Love Song of Ed and Ing

I had hopes of writing something literary here, but I just don't have the juice to do it. Instead, I will just say what I want to say.

"God created the universe," is one way of explaining the existence of everything. Once upon a time God made stuff and it has been here ever since. We people, as part of God's stuff, get to rearrange the stuff with certain limitations. Life is somewhat static and certainly the act of creation is complete.

"God began creating the universe and never quit," is another way to explain the existence of everything. Once upon a time God began the truth process and in that process somewhere along the way, people came along and were invited into the process of creation of truth. We were invited as co-creators with certain limitations.

It cannot be stated strongly enough that the difference between the two perspectives is more than semantics. Replace the word "universe" with the word "truth" and you will see how relevant this discussion is.

It might be more digestible to replace "universe" with "love," but then I think we are playing more semantics.

The "ED" versus "ING" debate is the crux of the difference between the emerging church and those opposed to it. The emerging church has come to realize that there is also an ING on creation, on love, and on truth and not merely and ED. Critics stake their hopes and confidence on the fact that there is an ED and only an ED.

There is that which is what God created and there is that which God is creating and they not not necessarily different things.

For example, Abner Doubleday is credited by many with having created baseball back in the 1800's. So, baseball was created. However, baseball is in a constant process of creation. The rules are different, there is pay for the game on the professional level, there are huge multi-hundred-million dollar stadiums and on and on. The game looks almost nothing like what he created, and yet it is the thing he created.

Baseball was s created and is in the process of creation.

Why is this so hard to understand with God? In church? With faith?

ED and ING are not against each other - they are in love with each other. Why must we make enemies of lovers?

Hype Spike In Steep Decline

This chart shows the number of blog posts per day about Don Bartch.

It appears that the bloggers have something or someone else to blog about now. I am sure that there will be a blip here and there, but bloggers are all ADD anyway, so this story is so yesterday.

I am glad.

The future of Don Bartch is still in question. Will the school district succomb to the pressures of the media and blog generated firestorm and fire him or will they keep one of their finest administrators? This is something we do not yet know.

Whatever their decision, the school district ought to keep it out of the media as best as they can. I know that is impossible to prevent, but they don't need to go make a big deal out of their decisions and how they came to those decisions either. Going to the media is lose-lose. If they fire him, they are shooting themselves in the foot for a short-lived sense of self-righteous affirmation by the uninformed, but agitated, masses. If they keep him, they will suffer further scrutiny. They need to just go about the business and ignore the media and the blogs (except mine of course) and do what is right.

Let's hope their decision makers have wisdom.

Olive Water - Try it - Try it in Hindi

My daugher likes olives and she likes water. So she made olive water.

And just for fun, Blogger allows me to translate into Hindi:

म्य्दौघेर लिकेस ओलिवेस ऎंड शे लिकेस वाटर, सो शे मदे ओलिवे वैर।

Pagitt: Terrible Non-christian

My friends over at a blog called Slice of Laodicea have determined that Doug Pagitt is not a Christian. Well, they may be right, but if he is not a Christian, he's a pretty lousy one.

Doug Pagitt is a terrible non-Christian. Here are ten reasons why:

10. He keeps baptizing people and then telling anyone who is watching that baptism is like dying with Christ and being resurrected with Christ.

9. He insists on referecning the Bible in religious gatherings.

8. At religious gatherings, he promotes a program that gathers, prepares, and serves food to working poor and homeless people.

7. His frequent praying makes him a poorly disciplined non-Christian.

6. Oh yeah, he's a pastor. Bone-headed career choice for the non-Christian.

5. Constantly seeks how to perpetuate what Jesus started 2000 years ago Very stupid thing for a non-Christian to do.

4. I saw him, with my own eyes, worshipping God with songs that honored Jesus. What a crappy non-Christian.

3. He constantly encourages a local group of people to bless the world as Jesus blessed the world. Why does he do this?

2. He wastes a lot of time writing books that unfortunately a lot of people read. These books inspire people to consider how to treat each other, communicate and express faith, and why there is reason for hope. Abject failure at the non-Christian life.

1. Maybe he doesn't realize this, but he has helped many people who were crushed under the weight of dead religion breathe new life and see Jesus more for who He is and not for what religion has made Him to be.

So, my friends over at Slice who claim Doug is not a Christian might be right, but I know from experience that he is a pretty lousy non-Christan.

Of Captains and Ships (and stowaway scapegoats)

I have read many times in the wake of the whole fake gunmen story that the captain goes down with the ship. That is code for Don Bartch , the assistant principal on the trip, needs to get fired.

I understand the thinking and I agree with the thinking. I agree with the thinking when it is applicable. It applies in situations when the ship must go down. This is not one of those situations.

There is no need for a ship to sink for this situation. Oh sure, people are still all ticked off about the Virginia Tech thing, and they should be. They are mad because they did not get proper justice for the wacko that killed all the people at VT. They are mad because the killer took his own life and there was no sense that justice could be placed upon him. There is a bulging and unrequited hatred pent up in America and lots of people are looking someone to take it out on. Taking it out on Don Bartch because of a poorly reported and highly sensationalized story is just too easy.

The ship does not have to sink. Any psychological damage done, which is minimal and highly exaggerated by the media, will be healed. I was a school teacher and I have seen first hand what happens in schools and seen what (some) teachers do and are not get fired for that cause more damage than this incidnet has caused. Most teachers are terrific, but there are some real pieces of crap out there that hurt children's feeling on a day by day and hour by hour basis, but they keep their jobs. Why? Because they are not pinned down by the media. This situation is with good teachers and an administrator who saw a prank going too far and ended it. They attended to the kid's feelings. They showed their care and concern. Did that get reported?

People who say that the captain needs to go down with his ship in this situation are simply looking for a ship to go down rather than weighing the facts of the story as they are, not as they are reported by the media.

When Scary Stories Go Bad

***This is an update on the fake gunmen story in Murfreesboro***

It was a scary story run amuck that got the whole fake gunmen incident going. Apparently the teacher who thought up the story was a pretty good story teller.

Sitting out at a camping trip and telling stories is a tradition that goes back who knows how long? Kids getting scared by ghost stories and evil of all kinds is part of the tradition. Stories of these kinds give the sense of ambivolent fear that says, "that could never happen, but I am not going back to my cabin alone."

Had there been no Virginia Tech story, there would be no Fall Creek Falls camping trip story. period. The national zeitgeist was such that people really do kill people with guns. Columbine, Jonesboro, and Red lake had all worn off - but Virginia Tech had not.

When you are in the situation like this, there is a point when the situation crosses the line and then there is the point when you recognize that it is crossing the line. The teacher took it too far. True to his character, Bartch is being truthful and is not hanging anyone out to dry.

I hope that the two week suspension is the extent of the punishment (too much in my opinion). If the one or two parents who are out for blood demand his head on a platter and they get it, then the school district administration is gutless and no place anyone would want to work for.

I think that if they ask for Bartch's resignation, the enrtire faculty ought to join Bartch with their resignations as well. Yes, I think that he is that important to the school. If they fire him, then good luck trying to get someone in that position with half the character of Bartch.

All a firing would do is satisfy (or not) a few gripers and appease the ignorant outcries in the media. It would be a short term fix. But then finding a new assistant principal in a school district that makes scapegoats of their best people is no place anyone with any self-resepct would want to work. In short, a firing will shut people up for now, but will be bad for children.

The school distrcit should stand by the assistant principal in the same way the assistant princiapal is standing by the teacher.

***UPDATE***Don Bartch Is A Decent Guy

***UPDATE***

1. All quotes from Don Bartch are not true as he has not given any interviews.

2. Don Bartch did not organize, plan, authorize, or have any knowledge of the fake gun attack until it was in process.

3. He decided not to let the teacher who concocgted this plan not hang out to dry. Bascially, he is standing in front of a bullet (media) for the teacher.

4. In short, he is taking one for the team on a national stage.

THAT is the Don Bartch I know.



Everyone wants to take Don Bartch to the woodshed. He's the assistant principal who, along with another teacher, took a group of 6th graders on a trip to Fall Creek Falls. They staged a fake attack by a gunman. The way this story is being reported makes these guys sound like montsters. Bartch, I know, is not a monster.

I know this guy personally and I can tell you beyond the shadow of a doubt that he is a man of integrity and honor. I think that the fact that one of the kids who experienced this situation said the following is testimony to the fact that he is a decent guy.

Student Shay Morris said, "If (the assistant principal) loses his job, I will break into tears. He's the best assistant principal I've ever had."


It comes as no surprise to me that a student would say this about Don. I am quite sure that most of the students who have come into contact with him would say the same. It is almost impossible not to like this guy.

If you are the kind of person who wants to waylay people reported in the news, here's your chance, so I guess you can go ahead. But you need to understand that you are taking out your rage on one of the best people I know.

Sinead O'Connor's Theology

If you do not go and listen to this song you will be missing out on something beautiful.

My Church Pews

Happy Mother's Day

These flowers are for my mother, who is in Palm Springs on much deserved vacation.

I don't remember being born, but I believe the stories that say I was. I am so glad that my mother carried me for nine and half months. I am glad to have been born into my family.

We were not the perfect family. Who could boast such a thing? We were far from the location of perfection, but we always on the pathway to being perfected. My family, even though I never knew it when I was young, was constantly in the process of being reconciled to God. My mother in her way and my father in his way.

My mother, when she came to know Jesus, never looked back. Bold, courageous, and willing to cross the line for her faith, she showed me that when you believe in something, you believe it all the way. When she was not supported in her faith from every direction, she was not deterred.

I learned to finish what I begin, take risks, and not let anyone else determine my beliefs if those beliefs were not honoring of God from my mother.

I am grateful to my mother today.

My mother is a beautiful woman and she deserves flowers.

What to do with perfection

Perfection is a strange thing. It is the thing many people try to accomplish. It is the thing some people despair over for not accomplishing. It is the standard some people hold over others in order to have power over them. Perfection is an unusual and powerful thing.

Perfection is problematic when it is used as the destination point. When success is marked by perfection, then failure is certain and frequent. Perfection must not be a location.

Rather, pefection should be a compass. It should be the thing that guides you toward becoming something better, in a direction truer than others. The measure of success should be like going north rather than arriving at north.

There is no need to beat yourself up (or anyone else) for not arrving at perfection. Instead, spend energy on moving in its direction.

What I want in a car

I want a flex fuel hybrid plug in car for under $15,000 that uses electricity made from wind. I want it to plug as an option, but not a requirement. I want it to have enough room for my family. I want it to perform well, last for 15 years, and and not look like a dorkmobile. I want it to get 70 miles to the gallon on a really bad day.

What? Why are you looking at me like that? Like they can't make it.

No More Baby Talk

During get ready time this morning, I knocked on the bathroom door and asked, (Sierra is my 9 year old daughter)

"Sierra, are you in there?"

"Yes."

"Are you going potty?"

"No!" She replied with a tone of voice indicating that I was an idiot for asking such as question.

"I mean, are you going to the bathroom?"

"Yes," with a tone of voice that said, "what else would I be doing in here?"

"Right," I say, "we don't talk baby talk anymore, do we?"

"Uhm, yeah," she said - and I guarantee she rolled her eyes.

So, as my children are growing, I am required to grow and change at a pace that matches their maturity level. For some reason, my vocabulary about what happens in the bathroom has gotten stuck. Yes, sometimes I get stuck and keep treating my kids as though they didn't change or grow in the past year or two.

Any other parents out there find that you are not growing in your parenting as fast as your kids are goriwing as kids?

Al-gebra terrorists on the move

Click here to see what the terrorists are doing and how America fights back!

3 of 3

I just finished my third of three papers due this week - a grand total of 51 pages (actually not that bad). Look at the time stamp at the bottom of this post and then you will know what kind of condition I am in right now.

Now to bed. All I have left to do by Tuesday is study for a final, take a final, prepare for my annual academic review, write an application for a grant, code a bunch of transcripts, prepare a team meeting, facilitate a team meeting, assign a months worth of duties for my team, do a needle-in-a-hay-stack literature search, plan my coursework for the next three years, coach my son's first ever baseball game, attend a social function, read 7 articles and summarize them, and be there for my family.

Not a problem. Good night.

Marshall is in Malibu...

... learning things about church and God.

***UPDATE*** I don't want to hear it!!! Eavesdropping on the grandma's club

**************UPDATE - SEE BELOW**********************
I am sitting in Panera Bread Company, my favorite place to write a paper. I am in the corner booth. The grandma's club has occupied some tables to my right.

What you don't want to hear from the grandma's club:

1. Any self-descritpive comments containing the words "my boobs"
2. "I'm overstimulated!" at a near shouting level.
3. Comparisons about bras.
4. Comments about the "day and age of stalkers."
5. All of this interspersed with, "I just love being a grandma."

I gotta get this paper done and get outta here.


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6. "I've been fondled enough already today."
7. "Once a day is all you need."

I H8 txt msg

Click here to learn what you kids are texting.

TAFN

Northern Comfort

If you sit outside down south in the month of May and take a look over at the street light or yard light, you'll notice what looks like a snowstorm - bugs.

Here in Minnesota, it is beautiful - 70 degrees and no bugs (yet).