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Monday, June 20, 2005

On the toilet

Warning, toilet talk ahead

I read books. I read a lot of books and I only wish I couild read faster and more of them. So, I maximize my time as best I can. Like many people, I read in the bathroom.

However, this morning it struck me as humorous and a bit embarrassing that I am reading "Man's Search For Meaning," while on the toilet. I think it was when I put the words "Man's Search For Meaning On The Toilet" together that I realized just how funny this scene was.

So, as I pondered Man's Search For Meaning on the Toilet, I went deep and pondered what other books I have read (or are in my stack to read) and how they would sound on the toilet. It goes like this:

Searching For God Knows What On The Toilet
The Story We Find Ourselves In On The Toilet
The Divine Conspiracy On The Toilet
How To Read A Book On The Toilet
Finding Faith On The Toilet

If only I could shut my mind off, but I couldn't. Movies came to mind.

A Series of Unfortuneate Events On The Toilet
Man On Fire On The Toilet
28 Days On The Toilet
Hope Floats On The Toilet

Someone, stop me, please!!!!!!!!!

20 comments:

Donna G said...

Everybody's Normal Till You get to Know them on the toilet

My Movie contribution

Revenge of the Sith on the Toilet

Looking down I see a catalogue-
Victoria's Secret on the toilet!

(I should have been a guy)

Fajita said...

LOL

Donna, great additions. Anyone else?

Phil said...

Well, heck.

A New Kind of Christian on the toilet.
The Divine Conspiracy on the toilet.
A Church that Flies on the Toilet.

believingthomas said...

The incredibles on the toliet

Look who's coming to diner on the toilet.

Wild at Heart on the toilet

Stormfront on the toilet

A short history of a small place on the toilet

Anything with the word Emergent works.

Steve said...

Cold Mountain on the Toilet
Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell them On the Toilet
God's Holy Fire on the Toilet
Intended for Pleasure on the Toilet
Every Man's Battle on the Toilet
Anointed for Business on the Toilet
The Power of a Praying Wife on the Toilet
Tuesdays with Morrie on the Toilet
This Present Darkness on the Toilet

Movies:
Return to Me on the Toilet
As Good as it Gets on the Toilet
Don't Say a Word on the Toilet
Changing Lanes on the Toilet
Finding Forrester on the Toilet
Waiting for Guffman on the Toilet

and my favorite...

A Mighty Wind on the Toilet

Steve out.

Fajita said...

You all are killing me - on the toilet.

Fajita said...

They Smell Like Sheep On the Toilet
The Bible Jesus Read On The Toilet
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Poeple On The Toilet

The Beautiful Letdown On The Toilet
Healing Rain on the Toilet
Should I Stay or Should I Go On The Toilet

Oh why do I think this way?

Fajita said...

Training Day On THe Toilet

Breaking Free On The Toilet

I promise, I am done.

Steve said...

Just looking around my office for more inspiration:

Cd's
Smell the color 9 on the toilet
Offerings on the Toilet
Genius loves company on the toilet

Books (I am a social worker who works with kids and families)

Becoming Attached on the toilet
Lost & Found on the toilet
High Risk on the toilet
The Tipping Point on the toilet

This reminds me of the old game I played as a child when we would go through the hymnal and add "under the sheets at night" to the title. For example "How great thou art under the sheets at night."

My father thumped my head because I had lost myself in giggles from that game.

Phil said...

The Zoe Version

The Days of Elijah on the Toilet
This is How We Overcome on the Toilet
Light the Fire on the Toilet
Had It Not Been the Lord on the Toilet
All the Heavens on the Toilet

And finally,

My God Reigns on the Toilet (There's nowhere else that I'd rather be....)

Donna G said...

Nothing prompts comments like bathroom humor....

When Harry Met Sally On the Toilet
While You Were Sleeping ON the Toilet
Sex, Lies & Videotapes..on the toilet


I embarrass myself....

Fajita said...

It appears that (according to the number of comments) women's roles in public worship and toilet talk are the most important issues to my blog readers. That, my friends, is a curiousity.

Thanks for the fun. If there are more funny ones out there, I guess you could keep them coming.

Peace.

Ray Fleming said...

Here's my list:

Morning & Evening on the Toilet

The Cost of Discipleship on the Toilet

The God Who Is There on the Toilet

If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat on the Toilet

Deana Nall said...

Here's some inspiration from my bookshelf:

To Kill a Mockingbird on the Toilet
Outsmart Diabetes on the Toilet
Pictorial History of Baytown, Texas on the Toilet
Mars and Venus in the Bedroom on the Toilet
Great Images of the 20th Century on the Toilet

And...

Prickly Pear on the Toilet
(Prickly Pear is the yearbook from ACU -- named for the fruit a cactus produces. Ouch!)

CL said...

Excellent, I had to add my .02:

7 Practices of Effective Ministry on the Toilet
More Ready Than You Realize On The Toilet
BreakOut Churches on the Toilet
Bridger Generation On The Toilet
Evangelism Outside the Box on The Toilet
101 Ways to Reach Your Community on The Toilet
Blue Like Jazz on the Toilet
Stop Dating the Church on the Toilet
The Ministry of Nurture on the Toilet
Reimagining Spiritual Formation on The Toilet
The Emerging Church on The Toilet

And my favorite:

The Crux of The Matter on The Toilet

OK, I could go all day, and I cheated a bit I am pretty much just looking at some of my books and typing them in, but man this is fun. - In a weird toilet sort of way.

Unknown said...

This is like that fortune cookie game.... read the cookie and add
"in bed".

My wife and i would do that... then we had kid(s).... we decided to end the fortune cookie with "in Disneyland".

But, now I have to add something here.....

but don't stone me!

The Passion on the toilet.
Finding Nemo on the toilet.
Winnie the Pooh's great adventure on the toilet.


Books:

How to read the Bible for all it's worth on the toilet.
systematic theology on the toilet.
Soul Tsunami on the toilet.

Desiring God on the toilet.....

A side note here....


"1 Kings 1827. At noon Elijah began to taunt them. "Shout louder!" he said. "Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened."

Notice the phrase "in deep thought"
the hebrew as I understand is actually, "maybe your god is on the toilet".


blessings... on the toilet.
iggy

iggy said...

This is like that fortune cookie game.... read the cookie and add
"in bed".

My wife and i would do that... then we had kid(s).... we decided to end the fortune cookie with "in Disneyland".

But, now I have to add something here.....

but don't stone me!

The Passion on the toilet.
Finding Nemo on the toilet.
Winnie the Pooh's great adventure on the toilet.


Books:

How to read the Bible for all it's worth on the toilet.
systematic theology on the toilet.
Soul Tsunami on the toilet.

Desiring God on the toilet.....

A side note here....


"1 Kings 1827. At noon Elijah began to taunt them. "Shout louder!" he said. "Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened."

Notice the phrase "in deep thought"
the hebrew as I understand is actually, "maybe your god is on the toilet".


blessings... on the toilet.
iggy

Deana Nall said...

Here's some inspiration from my bookshelf:

To Kill a Mockingbird on the Toilet
Outsmart Diabetes on the Toilet
Pictorial History of Baytown, Texas on the Toilet
Mars and Venus in the Bedroom on the Toilet
Great Images of the 20th Century on the Toilet

And...

Prickly Pear on the Toilet
(Prickly Pear is the yearbook from ACU -- named for the fruit a cactus produces. Ouch!)

DJG said...

Nothing prompts comments like bathroom humor....

When Harry Met Sally On the Toilet
While You Were Sleeping ON the Toilet
Sex, Lies & Videotapes..on the toilet


I embarrass myself....

Chad said...

Ok, last ones from me as well.

The Problem of Pain on the Toilet

A Gentle Thunder on the Toilet


Thanks for the humor today. It was needed.