Beginning To See in Color

When I was born:

• The Watts Riots were less than 5 years old. 
• The Voting Rights Act was less than 5 years old.
• MLK and RFK assissnations were less than 2 years old.
• Racial tension was high
• "Jesus loves the little children" was a big hit in Vacation Bible Schools
• "Red and Yellow, Black and White, they are precious in His sight."

Growing up in suburban, white Minnesota, however, I was buffered from so much of the racial turmoil. Suburban life provided a sort of privilege that kept me located in a place that did not have racial tension, but not because people of different races got along so well. Instead there was no racial tension because there was so little observed racial diversity in Bloomington and Apple Valley, Minnesota - at least not observed by me. 

I had no idea the social, cultural, and political context of the cute little VBS song. I recall my mother making the point, too strongly it seemed at the time, that all people are equal no matter the color of their skin. I also knew jokes about race were not acceptable. 

My childhood years took place in the lingering hangover of the racial violence of the 1960's, but I was not aware of it. 

When I was a teenager in the 1980's, I recall President Reagan aspire to a color-blind approach to race relations. To me, it seemed progressive and fair. And it was, compared to how I understood racism - a collection of offensive jokes and things that happened in history "a long time ago." However, I was not attuned well enough to observe the stark contrast between "red, and yellow, black and white" and being color blind. Frankly, the same people in my life were saying both messages. 

So I was left in a swirl of mixed messages of which I was unaware. 

• I was unaware that one message highlighted difference while the other message dismissed difference - both messages intended to resolve the huge problem that difference was something people had divided on. 
• I was unaware that difference was used to rank people. I couldn't see it because social structures such as housing, economics, churches and the social networks within them kept me deeply buffered into my own kind. 
• I was unaware that history is not static, but sets trajetories. I  knew some bad stuff happened once upon a time, but I was unaware of 
• how moments in history, ranging from individual behaviors to massive societal systemic processes, served to create the framework for the future, 
• how moments in history gave us the vocabulary for very current conversations, 
• how  moments in history caused wounds that were slow to heal
• how moments in history highlighted and obscured what seemed availabe to grasp as reality.  

Many of these processes have come to light to me - the older I get the more of them I see. I am certain there are more to come. It is unnerving seeing the processes set in place that keep people ranking each other's value, that keep people objectifying each other based on arbitrary criteria, that keep people living their lives by perceived threats that perpetuate strategies of threat management. For example, the accumulation of aggressive and violent means of eliminating threat and keeping these mean in reserve just in case - resulting in a silent arms race that seeks to resolve our fear by show of force.  

I think we can agree that skin color is not the problem. 

I think we can all agree skin color differences do not deserve violence. 

I think we can all agree skin color should not change a person's risk of being killed. 

Where people diverge is how meaning has been and is currently being assigned to skin color. From assigned meaning flows how much people will tolerate someone being treated badly. The paradoxical and problematic process in place is that the people most invested in articulating a message of "race doesn't matter" are the very same people for whom race has served very well - and mattered quite a lot in their favor. Admittedly, it is much easier to notice suffering due to race when you are the one suffering than it is to notice privileges and opportunties due to race when you are the one experienceing the privileges and opportunities. Suffering is seen as unjust while privileges and opportunities experienced long enough simply register as normal - like "what have you done wrong NOT to be getting these privileges and opportunities? Look at me - I did it."

I see color now. I see "Red and Yellow Black and White" and Brown and Olive and... I see how the distribution of justice is skewed one way and distribution of privilege is skewed the in the opposite way. I still believe skin color does not cause problems. At the same time, I do believe that the assigned meaning to skin color by humans has gotten us to where we are right now. And where we are today needs improvement. 

I see color. I see color and I think everyone should see color as well. But when we see color, 

• I want to see color redemptively, not by some ranking system.
• I want to see color and have all manner of positive assumptions be the first thoughts I have.
• I want to see color as God's imagination.
• I want see color as an indicator that I have something to learn.
• I want to see color and wonder what special thing God has hidden within that culture He has not hidden within mine. 
• I want to see color and feel relieved that there are more people than people just like me.
• I want to see color and wonder what great strength has emerged within the cutlure that has arisen around that color.
• I want to see color. 
• I want to see color. 
• I want to see color. 

What do you want to see when you see color?

What do you want to look for when you see color? 

What will you need to get over in order to see color redemptively? 

We can do this. 

I say "Black Lives Matter"

I say ‪#‎Blacklivesmatter‬ because there is so much history and current events suggesting that black lives have not mattered enough and still do not matter enough.

In slavery, Black lives did not matter enough
In the US constitution, Black lives did not matter enough
In the Jim Crow era, Black lives did not matter enough
In the Selma, Black lives did not matter enough
In department stores, Black lives do not matter enough
On roads and highways, Black lives do not matter enough


In prisons, Black lives do not matter enough
In Baton Rouge and Falcon Heights, Black lives did not matter enough

Until we have experienced no fewer than three generations of unquestioned equality, we will not have said #Blacklivesmatter enough.

Currently, we have not had five straight minutes of unquestioned equality.

Let's get to work.

Uhm, I Don't Have Any Black Friends

Here is a somewhat awkward post about white privilege and black lives matter by a guy named Gonzalez, but here it goes.

I have friends who are Black. Real friends. Life long friends who I went to church camp with as a kid, who I went to college with when I was trying to learn how to be an adult, who stood up for me as groomsmen in my wedding, and continue to be great friends.

So how did that happen? Luck. Honestly, it was luck. Perhaps it was more than luck and it was an act of God. All I know is that it did not happen by any effort on my part to connect with Black people.

I grew up attending nearly all white schools.
I went to a nearly all white colleges for undergrad, masters and doctorate.
I have always lived in nearly all white neighborhoods.
I have always attended nearly all white churches.
All of my jobs except 1 have been in nearly all white workplaces.
I married a white woman.
I have white children.
I shop where white people shop.
I eat out where white people eat out.

How in the world am I supposed to have a bunch of Black friends if everywhere I go is filled with white people?

And that is exactly the right question. I have made choices within the existing institutions, social structures, and geographies that were presented to me. In short, I have lived my whole life in the flow of a culture that made being with white people the easiest, most obvious and most advantageous choices for me to make - over and over and over again. Other options were available, yes, but mostly obscured from my eyes.

I would have had to work and work hard to choose otherwise.

I do not have friends who are Black because I ever traveled a cultural divide of any kind, but rather because my friends who are Black have lived, for whatever reason, in my predominantly white world. I am grateful for that, humbled by it. It costs them something (every single day) to live in this world that it does not cost me.

When I talk about white privilege, it is (usually) not some sinister thing white people intentionally do to be extra super white. It is not about white people saying, "hey, look at me, I'm all white and we all know what that means." Instead it means that there are institutions and social processes already in motion that highlight options, possibilities and expectations for white people that keep white people all together and obscure a broad scope of options, possibilities, and expectations that would integrate people. The available options often times have benefits to them provided the individual works hard and plays by the rules (and sometimes working hard and playing by the rules are optional). These benefits are enticing and who doesn't like benefits?

The problem is that these same options are not highlighted for non-whites as often as for whites and they are often not nearly as accessible. The options, possibilities, and expectations for non-whites are different and often have fewer benefits. Much of these options are obscured from view for non-whites. The cultural flow passes by non-whites differently than it does whites - and sometimes it is not even the same cultural river flowing by.

These processes are generally not sinister on the individual level (the level at which most people take offense when they hear the world "privilege"), but they are on the cultural and institutional level. Very few white people wake up each morning and say to themselves, "Ahhh yes, another day to cash in on my white privilege at the expense of non-whites." And no one is really making the accusation that white people are saying such things (with the exception of a few corrupt CEOs of major corporations). What is so sinister about the societal and institutional levels of white privilege is that they are mostly so invisible to the people accessing them that they feel normal.

But Chris, aren't you Latino? How can you even talk about white privilege? 

It is a fair question if we have never met. I assure you, I have my white card. So here goes: I do get junk mail written in Spanish sometimes (that I can't read), get a sweet farmer's tan in the summer and three generations ago my great grandparents who I never met lived in Mexico. But I am as Mexican as Tom Fischer from Nebraska is German. Family processes and American culture have effectively scrubbed so much Mexican from my identity. I love being a Gonzalez, but that's now you learn Spanish or have a cultural identity. Yes, I have had some moments that remind me I am not always seen as white, but generally I pass as white and if my name were Smith, I would probably always pass as white.

My point in all of this is that what we are facing is not only on the individual level, but it is also on the cultural level and includes institutions and social processes with long histories that perpetuate divisions between people - even if those divisions are not part of the current intention of the institution. The divisiveness survives because they are not overtly intention and "normal."

What I need to do is to create space in the normal and consistent flow of my life where I am in a context where I am not part of the dominant culture. I need to situate myself into places where I am the learner, the student, the one who has to work hard to understand what the assumptions, expectations, and options are. Sometimes I need to be in a context where it is impossible for me to ever be the expert or the hero.

Perhaps if I can find a way to get the privilege of being invited into the flow of another culture I could have more non-white friends.

White Privilege

If you are a white American, then you probably are not aware of what comes easy to you that does not come easy to ethnic minorities. In fact, you might even bristle a little at the idea that you have some kind of advantage. Things are hard, money is tight, perhaps antidepressants help you navigate anxiety - it sure doesn't feel like any sort of privilege.

Well, race is an issue, a social reality, and a personal identity that no one can afford to not care about.

Here is a link to a blog (whitePrivilege.com) that might be of interest to you or maybe of challenge to you. Check it out.